User blog:Biggren/An Oldbeast's Tale

A story by meself, Corbus, Red, Salem, Niko, Forest, Jump and Ratthias:


 * In the depths of Mossflower Wood, in the deep of winter, wehn the wind howls and blows, and gathers the snow into great drifts, a shack sits. Inside, in front of a cozy fireplace, a crowd of young vermin are expectantly waiting for a midwinter story. An old fox hobbles in and sits back in his chair by the fire. "Now, little uns, gather round an' `ear me tale..."
 * A little wolf cub with red eyes sits next to the old fox. "Stowy time!"
 * The old fox chuckles. "Now lemme see, it was about twenny- no, thirty seasons back. This was back when I was but a young un like you."
 * The wolf cub whistles. "Mus' of been long timey ago!!!!"
 * Suddenly a voice is heard from the babes. "Loser! This is the average beginning to most tales! Give us something more interesting instead of this boring start to the ev'nin'!"
 * The wolf cub smacks the babe and shushes him.
 * A weasel chuckles.
 * The fox is stunned at the babe's impudence but manages to keep his cool. "Oh, yer right there, liddle un," he says quietly. "NOW GET OUT!!! I'm tellin' the story `ere!" A ferretbabe steps forward and bites the wolfbabe. "NYAH!!!"
 * The wolfbabe snarls and bites him back.
 * Corbus is confused.
 * The fox screeches: "I'M TELLIN' A STORY `ERE???"
 * Niko is eating cheese and not sharing with the kiddies*
 * A gigantic badger babe sits on both of the other babes.
 * "Now gimme me specticules, little idjit," says the fox angrily. The ferretbabe merely snaps the glasses to pieces. "Heeheehee!"
 * The wolfbabe snarls and shouts, "You meanie!!!!" and tackles the ferretbabe.
 * The fox stands up slowly. His eyes go from gold to deep crimson. "DIE!!! DIEDIEDIE!!!"
 * The big badgerbabe slaps the ferretbabe, sending him hurtling across the room.
 * Corbus sees them fighting and pulls them apart.
 * The feeble old fox boils with fury."NO-ONE BREAKS ME SPETICLES!!!"
 * The badgerbabe attempts to knife the fox.
 * The old un leaps into the fight, battling as well as any youthful creature.
 * "Ah, shad'up ya shoopid fosker!" somebeast yells.
 * Snarling and biting the fox- "Ow!" -throws the knife at the badger.
 * The wolfbabe keeps biting and clawing at the ferretbabe.
 * The unruly badgerbabe catches the knife in mid-air and stabs the fox in the footpaw.
 * "Yargh!" shouts the fox. Slowly he stands up. "Now," he pants. "GIMME. THOSE. SPECTACLES!"
 * Salem re-enters, completely full from her yummy dinner.
 * "YOWCHEE!!!"
 * Salem had philly cheese steak for dinner.
 * The fox scrambles out the door of the shack. "A'right, I won't tell the story now. I'll jus' go an' freeze in the snow if that's wot yer all wants..."
 * The babes plead fro the story to continue, but the fox remains adamant.The fox hisses like a serpent. "I am not putting up wid a wolfbabe, a badgerbabe an' a ferretbabe all at once!!!"
 * "I can help ye," offers Corbus.
 * The wolfbabe lets go of beating up the ferretbabe and runs to the fox. "Don't go! I want stowy!"
 * The old fox relents. "Alright then, if yer really wants me to. BUT ONLY IF YER REALLY WANTS ME TO!"
 * The wolfbabe nods furiously.
 * The old fox hobbles to the chair* "A'right den. Oh an', by der way, I jus' found a clean set o' specickles in d' snow out dere, he he."
 * The wolfbabe raises his paws and shouts, "YAH!!!"
 * "Now, twenny eight seasons ago it musta been, but me'n me ol' mate Ridjlug were werkin' fer Klarid Miglardy the Warlord(`e only `ad eighteen beasts in `is `orde countin' us, but, well, y'know how one kin exaggerate...). Pickin' up firewood was our duty.
 * "Klarid was a big ole weasel, mean one at that."
 * The wolfbabe chuckles. "Lardy sounds fat!!"
 * "An' the werst thing was..."
 * Suddenly the babes jump at the sound of the shack door being thrust open.
 * "Ahoy there, mates! Came over fer a visit oi did!" says the beast who entered, a stoat about as old as the fox.
 * "Why `ello, Ridjlug, yer `ere just in time fer th' story!"
 * The wolfbabe gasps. "Wow!"
 * The old stoat looks around. "I am? Oh, I guess I am, mate. I'll siddown `ere..."
 * Ridjlug, the stoat sits down in a creaky rocker in front of the fire as the fox picks up the story. "Now, if'n I fergit anything, ole Ridjy `ere'll be sure t' remember. Now,"
 * The wolfbabe looks at them with sparkling red eyes and waits.
 * "The werst thing about Klarid - no, `e wuzn't fat - was `is evil eyes an' sharp, shiny claws as cold as steel."
 * A babe looks up. "What's steel, sir?"
 * "Er, I dunno."
 * The wolfbabe raises his paw. "Its that shiny hard thing!!!"
 * "Wot's a shiny `ard thing?"
 * The babe speaks up. "Steel, o' course!"
 * "Oh, right matey."
 * The wolfbabe nods, and the old fox continues. "Anyways, as I wuz sayin'. Ridjlug'n me were trampin' through deep snow- it was winter like it is right now- an' I noticed somethin' shiny an' `ard- like that steel stuff yew were talkin' about, Wolfbabe- an' so I-"
 * A teen stoat with wide eyes scrambles into the room where the story is taking place. He shuffles in, making noise with his footpaws. Then he plops down next to the wolf babe and grins. "Sorry fer bein' late t' the story, old one," he grins mischeiviously.
 * Suddenly Ridjlug interrupts. "Yew didn't spot it! Oi did! What's more, you stubbed yer paw on it before yew even noticed it in the first place!"
 * Corbus looks at the stoat. "Hello" He puts out his paw. "I am Corbus."
 * The wolfbabe chuckles.
 * "Whatever," says the fox. "The steel was lovely, an' I picked it up an' realized it wuz a sword!"
 * The questioning bae sits up. "What's a sword?"
 * The wolfbabe raises his paw, "Its a sharp pointy sharpt thing!!!"
 * "and shiny!!!" finishes Wolfbabe.
 * The stoat, whose name is Werdo chuckles. "The sharp end guts beasts"
 * "Now anyways, we had brought it back to camp. All o' us in Klarid's gang only `ad wood spears an bone daggers- no swords or anything like that. Klarid wanted the sword d' moment `e saw it, so me'n Ridjlug escaped the camp, ran away we did."
 * "Then, clumsy Ridjlug slipped on a root an lost der sword."
 * "I did not! Yew did, oaf!"
 * "Nu uh!"
 * "Yes huh!"
 * "Nope. Yew lost it."
 * "YEW LOST IT!!!"
 * "YEW LOST IT!!"
 * "I'm leaving!!!"
 * The wolfbabe laughs, "You both lost it!! heheehe!!"
 * Werdo put his chin in his paws and grins at Ridjlug and the fox fighting. "Really? Interesting indeed."
 * "No, I'm leaving yew liar!"
 * "Lier!"
 * Werdo glances at the fox. "Continue the story now, will yer?"
 * The wolfbabe nods, "More stowy!!!!!!!"
 * He doesn't care about Ridjlug as of the moment. Ridjlug and the fox's quarrel drifts away outside, where they tussle in the snow until they finally surrender, panting. Then they sit up and shake paws. "Sorry mate."
 * "Right. Sorry fer losin' the sword."
 * "Yew didn't lose the sword, I did."
 * "Nu uh!"
 * "Uh hu!"
 * "NO!"
 * "YES!
 * "No!"
 * "YES YEW IDJIT!!!"
 * "NO!!!!"
 * The two disappear into the forest, still fighting.