User blog:Kenina the Fox/Redwall News at 6:00

Episode One : AK-47s and Theme Park Mishaps
Kenina: "Hello everyone, I am Kenina Fox."

Teresa: "I am Kenina's fursona, Teresa Cat. We welcome you to Redwall News at 6:00."

Kenina: "Our first story in tonight is about "The Second Redwall Wars". A drunken weasel named Colanad stupidly walked into the middle of the battlefield and was shot down accidentally by Sister Armel of Redwall Abbey. After shooting down the unlucky weasel accidentally, Armel fled into the heat of battle; where officials have yet to find her."

Teresa: "Officials reported Armel to have a AK-47 and was suppose to be aiming at Neildown the Otter. Instead, Colanad was shot nine times in the chest, legs, and head."

Kenina: "Colanad's family did not morn of the lost of their family member. Instead, they said : "''Colanad was always mentally challenged and needed help going to the bathroom; he claimed the toilet was going to eat him and flush him down into the ocean. Although he was somewhat loved by us, Conlanad will not be remembered.''" Then his family proceeded to write, draw, and stomp on his grave.

Teresa: "In other news, the first Theme Park in Mossflower History opened up today; "Mossflower Thrills". The first couple of hours for the theme park were going swell until a mouse-babe fell off the roller coaster named The Castle of Kotir. The mouse-babe died soon afterward and the family blames "Mossflower Thrills" for the lost of their son."

Kenina: "But, "Mossflower Thrills" is blaming the family because the already said dibbuns below the age of three are not allowed on the ride. We'll have more on this tomorrow at 6:00."

Teresa: "Who would put a dibbun on a ride called The Castle of Kotir ?"

Kenina: "Very very uncaring parents Teresa; that's who." *coughs and drinks some water* "Well, until tomorrow woodlanders and vermin, I am Kenina Fox."

Teresa: "And I am Teresa Cat. Goodnight everyone."