User blog comment:Skalarana/The Heartless/@comment-4677325-20130117033034

Ah, this looks a lot better. Adjectives can make reading a lot more interesting. The way you use more than one adjective to describe is a good habit. Here are a few phrases I noticed that stood out to me while I was reading: "unmasked, unfathomable sorrow," "yellowed, crooked teeth," "hidden malicious intent," "strangled squeal," and "sleek, dark mass." You are a great writer, keep it up!